Stoned Soliloquy

Rain never falls straight down. There’s always a gust of wind slanting it eastward, rendering the umbrella useless and blurring my vision as tiny water droplets fill my spectacles. I wish I could wear contacts, but my eyes pick up this incessant need to blink whenever something comes too close— fingers, eye drops, corrective lenses. Eye doctor visits are dreadful. Must he shine that light so brightly in my eyes just to see the back of them? And what is up with that eye pressure device? You could gouge someone’s eyeballs out with that thing! No thank you! I’d rather have glaucoma. At least then I’d have a medical excuse for the bud I smoked this morning, though maybe not the proper paperwork. Have you ever noticed that some of your best ideas come when you’re high? I’m actually thinking about inventing windshield wipers for glasses. I’d call them . . . FrameWipes! Better trademark that. Wouldn’t want some straight-faced, sober CEO with a six-figure salary and no creativity to back it up stealing my idea.

word count: 173

—Nortina


Flash Fiction for Aspiring Writers is a weekly challenge where you write a story in 100-150 words (give or take 25 words) using the provided photo prompt as inspiration.

wpid-photo-20150907075906099

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18 thoughts on “Stoned Soliloquy

  1. I love the conversation going on in this person`s head. I get what you`re saying about the eye doctor. Things near your eye`s can be distracting and a bit scary. But I love that he`s high and wants to trademark his idea, it`s very funny.

    Liked by 1 person

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