Suzie tossed the ball in the air and slammed her racket into it. It sailed toward the net, clipped the tape, wobbled on the edge, and dropped back onto Suzie’s side of the court.
“Double fault!” her coach yelled.
Suzie stomped her foot. Since the start of practice, she’d gotten only one ball over the net, and that ball landed just past the sideline into the doubles alley. Fault!
“How can I be like Venus and Serena when I can’t even get my serves into play?” Suzie whined.
“I want you to be better than them.” He tossed her another ball. She caught it on the edge of her racket. “Again!”
Suzie tossed the ball over her head and swung her racket. The ball bounced off the net, landing in the service box on the opposite side.
“Let! First service!”
Suzie rolled her eyes. At least it wasn’t a fault.
150 words exactly!
—Nortina
This is the second challenge for Flash Fiction for Aspiring Writers. The objective is to write a story using 100-150 words based on the provided photo prompt. Click the froggy icon to read more stories and add your own.
Featured image: http://www.zimbio.com/pictures/-GmgyZhPj1e/Olympics+Day+9+Tennis/qlD6SA1K3gm
You did a great job weaving the tennis references into the story in a way that makes sense for all readers. Wonderful story!
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Hey good job on all the tennis references. I played doubles for years, so I’m right there with you. I liked the flow of it, the imagery that you were able to achieve in so little words. For me I would’ve liked to see a bigger twist at the end, you had such nice build up in the beginning. But very nice overall.
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Nicely written, even though I don’t know the first thing about tennis, I could still here those balls popping as the hit the racket
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Vivid! I was on the court watching 🙂
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I liked your story. I could feel the frustration of the main character. Do you play? You know all the terms so well.
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I actually don’t play. Surprising, right? I’m not athletic at all, but I watch the sport religiously. I went 2 weeks without sleep last month because I was staying up all night watching the Australian Open! 😀
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I like the build up of frustration, questionable motivation, knowledge of tennis, and the comparison in the very last line. She looked (or at least tried to look) at the bright side. ^_^
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Great beginning – you immediately take the reader into the action. Suzie’s frustration comes across well. Nicely done!
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Nicely written piece here, Nortina. I like that she wants to be as good as two tennis champs and that her coach encourages her to be better than them.
Ellespeth
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Great story Nortina, as someone who was given a tennis racket as a small boy I well understand the frustrations the game can bring. Enjoyed your tale.
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I really liked your story but I have to admit, I don’t know much about tennis. I don’t understand that next to the last line.
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I figured that line would confuse people, that’s why I added the last line. Let means that although the ball landed inside the court, it hit the net so the server has to serve again, but they don’t lose the first serve. I hope that didn’t confuse you even more!
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That makes sense! Thanks!
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