Rebecca and Jeff sit in the gazebo overlooking the shallow stream. Jeff takes out his pick and strums a soft ballad on his guitar. Rebecca closes her eyes and sways with the music, humming and moving her hands with the waves of the stream below.
He picks up the tempo, strumming harder—a crescendo of notes falling into place. She twirls her head with the melody.
Suddenly, the music stops. She feels thin, dry lips against her own. She opens her eyes and looks into his.
“I wish you were older,” he says.
I wish you weren’t married,” she says.
—Nortina
word count: 100
Second time. I think I’m getting better at this! This is part of Friday Fictioneers. Click the froggy icon below to add your link and read others.
He doesn’t seem to want to remember he’s married. That’s more of a problem than her age. Good story, Nortina, and well done. 🙂 — Suzanne
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He’s just all kinds of scum, isn’t he? Well told story.
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Dear Nortina,
You’re definitely getting the hang of this. A friend of mine says that a good title adds a hundred words. Also it doesn’t count as part of your word count. 😉
Perfect ending lines. Well done.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Ha! I like that! Thanks 😀
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I’d agree that the title doesn’t really seem to go with the story, but I enjoyed the writing itself. There was an interesting feeling of a stalemate between the characters.
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Ha! I’m glad she got the last word.
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Nicely done. The dialogue at the end was crisp and decisive.
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What a jerk! Musician or not, he needs to get divorce papers before toying with a young woman’s heart.
Cheers!
MG
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What a beautiful story and a lovely end to their illicit romance. You’ve chosen an interesting title, because it gives so much away before we get tot eh sotry itself. I think I’d have preferred the suspense, but on the other hand it’s a nice way to make clear what happens next, so it’s a tough call.
Lovely descriptions of the music and its effect on her.
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Thanks. I’m glad you brought up the title, because I was really struggling to come up with a good one that captured what the story couldn’t say in 100 words!
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