This post is part of JusJoJan.
I had a dream about my ex last night. Not the crazy one, but my high school sweetheart. The one who got away. Although, I wouldn’t call him that either. We were bad for each other. We fought all the time, and I know for a fact that he cheated on me with the girl he’s dating now. Still, I can’t deny that I loved him like crazy. And the sex was amazing. Graduation night is one night I’ll never forget. Doesn’t that sound so cliché? The best sex I’ve ever had came on graduation night? I guess that’s when most girls get knocked up. Or is the prom night?
I don’t know why he was at my house in my dream. Dreams never offer an explanation. They just give you the broader picture. Leave you hanging with that one compelling image buried in your mind, causing you to question every aspect of reality the moment you wake up.
I was lying in bed when he casually walked into my room and asked if he could spend the night because he couldn’t find a ride home. I didn’t offer to drive him home or protest the inconvenience. I just got my air mattress from the closet and let him sleep on the floor.
Graduation night, we had sex on an air mattress. He and his mom and had just moved and hadn’t yet bought any furniture for the new house. She was on late shift at the emergency clinic, so we had an empty house and one air mattress all to ourselves. We ran around the house naked, spanking each other with damp towels and drinking apple juice. When we finally settled on the mattress, he planted a sloppy, wet kiss on my neck that made the bottoms of my feet tingle. I didn’t want the night to end.
I wonder if I was thinking about that night in my dream as I lay in bed, the only man I ever truly loved a couple feet away. I wonder if the memory of what we used to be motivated me to get out of bed and join him on the floor. I wonder if flashbacks of us being young and stupid and enjoying every second of it led me to kiss him sloppily on the neck, and then the lips. Maybe that’s why I climbed on top of him and travelled back in time to a place where we didn’t worry about infidelity, or gossip, whether or not we were right for each other, or if things were meant to be. A place where we could wave so long to the pretenses and just be two people enjoying the company we brought on one insignificant air mattress.
I woke up smelling his cologne this morning. Maybe he was here. Maybe he had the same dream. Maybe he woke up smelling me too.
View the prompt for JusJoJan Day 21-30 here.